Jokes, Funny jokes, Romantic jokes, Adult jokes

jo keh na sake wo fasana yaad aata hai

guzra hua dilkash jamana yaad aata hai

jab husn se ishq takraya tha kabhi

ghayal hua tha ek parwana yaad aata hai

dil se mohabbat ke tufaan uthe the

jab aankhon ka sapne sajana yaad aata hai

kasturi jaise din mehakte the

mere raaton ka gungunana yaad aata hai

aankhon ka mil kar jhuk jana nahin bhula

hothon ka thar_tharana yaad aata hai

mera usko kankhiyon se dekhna

baar baar aur uska wo muskurana yaad aata hai

raaton ko tanha yaad mein kisiki...

dhuan udata ek deewana yaad aata hai

Hamari dosti aur pyaar ke bhich ki patli lakheer
mein paar kar  nahi pata
Un nazdekiyo ka sabab batana chaha tha mein par. Tum nahi samjhe

 

Sang Chahta tha tumhare, saada ke liye
Tumhare liye apna pyaar jatana chaha tha mein par. Tum nahi samjhe

 

kabhi jhakkar meri aankhon mein dekha hota
Saari dasta pad lete tum
Be inteha pyaar jhalakta tha tumhare liye in mein par. Tum nahi samjhe

 

Badal ko par kar, taaro ke chadar se jab chalkti chandni chu tha mujhko
To lagta Baaho mein bhar liya tum ne
Mein tadpta raha tumhare liye par iss tadap ko...tum nahi samjhe

 

Apna kaam, Apne dost, Apne sapno mein khoya raha,
Apni Masrufiyat se tumhein na waqt mila,
Mere sapne, meri aarzoo, mere armano ko...tum nahi samjhe

 

Apne armano ko dafna kar jab mein kisi aur ka hua
Mere aanso pochte tum, mujhe samjhate raahe
Un aansoo ka kaaran, apna pyaar khone ki tadap,
Meri Adhuri kahani ko...tum nahi samjhe

A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband.

Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates. You may visit the store ONLY ONCE!

There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights.

There is, however, a catch. ... You may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. .

On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

Floor 1 - These men have jobs and love the Lord.

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The second floor sign reads:

Floor 2 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, and love kids.

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The third floor sign reads:

Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, and are extremely good looking.

" Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

*********

She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads:

Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop- dead good looking and help with the housework.

"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"

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Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads:

Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love the Lord, love kids, are drop- dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads:

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Floor 6 - You are visitor 4,363,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.

Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. Watch your step as you exit the building, and have a nice day!

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Send this to all men for a good laugh and to all the women who can handle the truth !

This is what True Love is all about:

It was a busy morning, approximately 8:30 a.m., when an elderly gentleman in his 80's, arrived to have stitches removed from his thumb. He stated that he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am.

I took his vital signs and had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before someone would to able to see him. I saw him look at his watch and decided, since I was not busy with another patient, I would evaluate his wound.

On exam, it was well healed, so I talked to one of the doctors, got the needed supplies to remove his sutures and redress his wound.

While taking care of his wound, we began to engage in conversation.  I asked him if he had another doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife.

I then inquired as to her health. He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer' s Disease .

As we talked, I asked if she would be upset if he was a bit late. He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now.

I was surprised, and asked him, "And you still go every morning, even though she doesn't know who you are? "

He smiled as he patted my hand and said, " She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is."  I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought, "That is the kind of love I want in my life."

True love is neither physical, nor romantic. True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.

With all the jokes and fun that are in e-mails, sometimes there are some that come along that have an important message, and this is one of those kind. Just had to share it with you all.

Lahro se dar kar noka par nahi hoti

Kosis karne walo ki kabhi har nahi hoti

 

Nanhi chiti jab dana lekar chalti hai

Chadti divaro se so bar fisalti hai

Man ka visvas rago me sahas bhar deta hai

Gir kar chadhna chadkar girna isiliye na akhrta hai

Mehnat uski khali har bar nahi hoti

Kosis karne walo ki kabhi har nahi hoti

 

Dubkiyan sindhu me gotakhor lagate hain

Jakar khali hath lot aate hain

Milte na sahaj moti gahre pani me

badhta duguna utsah isi herani me

muthi uski khale har bar nahi hoti

Mehnat karne walo ki kabhi har nahi hoti

 

Asafalta ek chunoti hai ise swikar karo

kya kami rah gai hai dekho or sudhar karo

jab tak na safal ho nind chain ki tyago tum

sangharso ka maidan chod mat bhago tum

kutch kiye bina hi jay jaykar nahi hoti

mehnat karne walo ke kabhi har nahi hoti.

Milke kiya tha jo hum ne kabhi wo ekraar bhool gaya  

 Gayero ke dard ka tu humdard tha
tere sitam ka koun dard karega  

 Soni hai rahe tnha ye dil hai
mera ye gum ab koun samjhe ga
Tujh pe kiya tha dil ne kabhi wo aatebaar bhool gaya 

  Khmosh aahe roti rahi dost howa ab ajnabi
Aaso bhi chobta tha ke hum en hi raho pe chalte thy kabhi
kine khush thy teri mhbbat se hum
dil soch ker rota hai abhi
Leke aayi thi wafaye jo kabhi wo bhaar bhool gaye  

Milke kiya tha hum ne ahed hum na badlege kabhi
Qasme wadwe bhoole tu bhi eska gum nahi
Anjaan banke dosto main mera naam bhi mere yaar bhool gaya
Kaisi mhbbat thi teri jo mera pyaar bhool gaya
Milke kiya tha hum ne kabhi wo ekraar bhool gaya

TEACHER : What is the chemical formula for water?
PAPPU : "HIJKLMNO ! "!!

TEACHER : What are you talking about?
PAPPU : Yesterday you said it's H to O !

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TEACHER : PAPPU, go to the map and find North America.
PAPPU : Here it is!

TEACHER : Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
CLASS : PAPPU!

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TEACHER : PAPPU, how do you spell "crocodile"?
PAPPU : "K-R-O-K-O-D-A-I-L"

TEACHER : No, that's wrong
PAPPU : Maybe it's wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!

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TEACHER : PAPPU, give me a sentence starting with "I".
PAPPU : I is...

TEACHER : No, PAPPU. Always say, "I am."
PAPPU : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."

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TEACHER : "Can anybody give an example of " COINCIDENCE?"

PAPPU : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."

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TEACHER : "George Washington not only chopped down his father's Cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?"

PAPPU : "Because George still had the axe in his hand?"

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PAPPU : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt?
FATHER : No. Why do you ask that?
PAPPU: Well, where did you get THIS mummy then?

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TEACHER : What a pair of strange socks you are wearing, one is green and one is blue with red spots !

PAPPU: Yes it's really strange. I've got another pair just like that at home.

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TEACHER : Now, PAPPU, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating ?

PAPPU: No sir, I don't have to , my mom is a good cook.

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TEACHER : PAPPU, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as yourbrother's. Did you copy his ?

PAPPU: No, teacher, it's the same dog !

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TEACHER : What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

PAPPU: A teacher

A woman came out of her house and saw 3 old men with long white beards sitting in her front yard. She did not recognize them. She said "I don't think I know you, but you must be hungry. Please come in and have something to eat."

"Is the man of the house home?", they asked.

"No", she replied. "He's out." 

"Then we cannot come in", they replied.

In the evening when her husband came home, she told him what had happened.

"Go tell them I am home and invite them in!"

The woman went out and invited the men in"

" We do not go into a House together," they replied.

"Why is that?" she asked.

One of the old men explained: "His name is Wealth," he said pointing to one of his friends, and said pointing to another one, "He is Success, and I am Love." Then he added, "Now go in and discuss with your husband which one of us you want in your home."

The woman went in and told her husband what was said. Her husband was overjoyed. "How n ice!!", he said. "Since that is the case, let us invite Wealth. Let him come and fill our home with wealth!"

His wife disagreed. "My dear, why don't we invite Success?"

Their daughter was listening from the other corner of the house. She jumped in with her own suggestion: "Would it not be better to invite Love? Our home will then be filled with love!"

"Let us heed our daughter's advice," said the husband to his wife.

"Go out and invite Love to be our guest ."

The woman went out and asked the 3 old men, "Which one of you is Love? Please come in and be our guest."

Love got up and started walking toward the house. The other 2 also got up and followed him. Surprised, t he lady asked Wealth and Success: "I only invited Love, Why are you coming in?"

The old men replied together: "If you had invited Wealth or Success, the other two of us would've stayed out, but since you invited Love, wherever He goes, we go with him. Wherever there is Love, there is also Wealth and Success !!!!!!"